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If you can not afford a doctor go to an airport.

You’ll get a free x-ray and a breast exam and if you mention Al Qaeda you will get a free Colonoscopy!

#10 - You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9 - You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you’re on the road.

#8 - If you admire a friend’s gun and tell him so he will probably let you try it out a few times.

#7 - Your primary gun doesn’t mind if you keep another gun for a backup.

#6 - Your gun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5 - A gun doesn’t take up a lot of closet space.

#4 - Guns function normally every day of the month.

#3 - A gun doesn’t ask , “Do these new grips make me look fat?”

#2 - A gun doesn’t mind if you go to sleep after you use it.

And the Number One reason Why Men Prefer Guns over women is

#1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun!

An 86 year old man goes for a physical. All of his test results come back normal.

The doctor says, “Gary everything looks great. How are you doing mentally and emotionally? Are you at peace with God?”

Gary replies, “God and I are tight. He knows I have poor eyesight so he has fixed it so when I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, “poof” the light goes on. When I am done, “poof” the light goes off.”

“Wow that is incredible,” the doctor says.

A little later in the day the doctor calls Gary’s wife. “Marianne, he says, Gary is doing fine but I had to call you because I am in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets up during the night and “poof” the light goes on in the bathroom and when he’s done, “poof” the light goes off?”

“OH MY GOD!” Marianne exclaims.

“He is peeing in the refrigerator again!!!!”

Q. Why did the fish get kicked out of school?
A. Cause he was caught with seaweed.

President Obama asked a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead how much it would cost to have sex with them.
The redhead said, “$200″.
The blonde said, “$100″.
The brunette replied, “Mr. President, if you can get my skirt up as high as my taxes, my panties as low as my wages, get your dick as hard as the times we’re living in now & keep it rising like gas prices & screw me the way you have the retirees, it won’t cost you a fucking cent!

What does the word Dhimmitude mean and why is it important?

Obama used it in the health care bill.

Now isn’t this interesting? It was used in the health care law.

Every day there’s another revelation of what Obama and his fellow Democrats are doing to our country.

Dhimmitude - I had never heard the word until now. Type it into Google and start reading. Pretty interesting. It’s on page 107 of the healthcare bill. I looked this up on Google and yep, it exists. It is a REAL word.

Amish , scientologists, christian scientists and Muslims are exempt (ARE EXEMPT) from the requirements of the health care bill. I think I could become Amish a whole lot easier than muslim.

Dhimmitude is the Muslim system of controlling non-muslim populations conquered through jihad. Specifically, it is the TAXING of non-muslims in exchange for tolerating their presence AND as a coercive means of converting conquered remnants to Islam.

Obama Care allows the establishment of Dhimmitude and Sharia Muslim diktat in the United States . Muslims are specifically exempted from the government mandate to purchase insurance, and also from the penalty tax for being uninsured.

Islam considers insurance to be “gambling”, “risk-taking”, and “usury” and is thus banned. Muslims are specifically granted exemption based on this.

How convenient. So I, as an American Citizen, will have crippling IRS liens placed against all of my assets, including real estate, cattle, and even accounts receivables, and will face hard prison time because I refuse to buy insurance or pay the penalty tax. Meanwhile, Louis Farrakhan will have no such penalty and will have 100% of his health needs paid for by the de facto government insurance. Non muslims will be paying a tax to subsidize muslims. Period. This is Dhimmitude.

Dhimmitude serves two purposes: It enriches the muslim masters AND serves to drive conversions to Islam. In this case, the incentive to convert to Islam will be taken up by tho se in the inner cities as well as the godless Generation X, Y, and Z types who have no moral anchor.

To check it out on Snopes click here: Health Insurance Exemptions http://www.snopes.com/politics/medical/exemptions.asp

Just answer the following six questions to win six tickets to the Superbowl 2011.

1. Which student seems to appear tired / sleepy?
2. Which ones are male twins?
3. Which ones are the female twins?
4. How many women are in the group?
5. Which one is the teacher?
6. Which two just finished a joint?

Every Red Blooded American should jump in line to support the Green Bay Packers! The Packers defeated the Chicago Bears on Sunday afternoon thus earning them the opportunity to go to the Super Bowl. By doing so they saved the Hard Working, Red Blooded, Taxpaying Americans literally several million dollars of tax money. How you say? Simple… we were told that if the Chicago Bears had won that President Obama (and probably his family) would be attending the Super Bowl to cheer on his hometown team. Since the Bears lost…the President won’t be attending. The money saved from not using Air Force 1, the limosines, all the additional security, and let’s not forget Michelle Obama’s entourage is literally several million dollars! Therefore every American should cheer on the Green Bay Packers at the Super Bowl to show them our gratitude. Oh and let’s not forget to thank Chicago Bear’s Quarterback Jay Cutler for his role in the Packer’s success! With that said Let’s Go Pack!

I was at my bank today and there was a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady who was trying to exchange yen for dollars.

It was obvious she was a little irritated! She asked the teller, “Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla fo yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?”

The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, “Fluctuations..”

The Asian lady says, “Fluc you white people too”

Click On Picture And I Bet I Will Guess Your Number Every Time!